Thursday, July 14, 2011

Why I Parent The Way I Do...

I'm sure you've read a time or two (or twenty) about my parenting quirks (side note, I don't prescribe to a particular style... I'm a mish mash, muddled kind of mama... I pick and choose what makes sense for my family).

Allow me a moment to explain why I do what I do - I know I'm not perfect (baahahahahaha... if you knew me in real life, you'd laugh at how absolutely absurd that notion is), so I try to mitigate my less awesome parenting moments (and the potential for forever damaging my child - okay, so I'm a freakin' nut... but I honestly cannot be the only mom that worries that they're going to eff their kids up for life, am I?), by doing things that I know will positively impact them.

Nursing
*  I *know* that nursing my boys is the best thing that I can do for them
* Your breast milk is perfectly balanced for your nursling.  (No, I'm not making this shit up... it is for realz).  What your child needs is what your body will create, so your morning milk won't be the same as your evening milk.  Your cold blustery winter milk won't be exactly the same as your muggy, hot-as-hell summer day milk.   And if you were to tandem nurse the milk that each child nursed would be different depending on their needs.  How freaking awesome is that!?!?!
*  It's easy (please note, that does not mean it is without difficulties but when I weigh the pros and cons unsnapping my bra is infinitely easier than making a bottle, warming said bottle and then cleaning the bottle afterwards [what can I say, I'm lazy])
*  It's free.  So, not only am I a lazy (I choose to term it as "Path of Least Resistance Mom"), I'm also cheap.  Cheap, cheap, cheap.  Formula?  Is expensive, expensive, expensive.  Since I *can* nurse, I'd much rather do so instead of paying for overpriced formula.


Babywearing
*  Babywearing totally appeals to the lazy mother in me - hold my child in their gagillion pound bucket seat whilst maintaining a firm hold on the darty-TT? OR strap C-McC to me, allowing my whole torso to bear his weight (so my arms don't feel like they're full of lead when I'm done running errands), allowing me to have my hands free to hold onto TT and push a cart if I so desire to do so.  Jeez, I wonder which way I'd prefer to shop?
*  Gotta nurse in public?  No problem, just do a shimmy & a shake, and you're good to go (and continue shopping... while holding your darty-TT's hand, try that with a bucket seat)
*  Inconsolable, overstimulated, grumpy-grump?  No problem (most of the time), slip them up... cuddle them close, hummmm and rock.  Bonus?  You don't have to worry about transferring them down, just continue on your merry little way!

Bedsharing/Co-sleeping
* We have chosen to sidecar C-McC crib to our bed (i.e. co-sleeping), so he goes down for the night in "his space" and when he wakes up to nurse, he ends up in our bed (i.e. bedsharing).  This works for us because I am able to quickly nurse him back to sleep (or snuggle if that's what he needs) and yes some nights it is a royal pain in the ass, but it totally goes along my "Path of Least Resistance" parenting philosophy.  I would much rather quickly nurse/cuddle him back to sleep than listen to him wail for hours on end (seriously, C-McC is super screamer... he does.not.have.an.off.button).
I don't sleep through the night (seriously, I wake up to pee, have a drink of water, just shift positions, etc) so I don't know why it is an expectation that our children must sleep through the night.  I find it much easier to roll over and do what needs to be done than to *gasp* get out of bed, walk down the hall and do what needs to be done (I told you that I was a lazy parent).
I believe that responding to my boys will result in well-adjusted men... I do not believe that children need to be taught to self-soothe (I feel that this is a skill that is acquired with age... ).  Please do not read this as "my children never cry" or "I would never let my child cry, ever".  They do cry (some days on an hourly basis), and honestly getting up multiple times during the night is not my cuppa tea but I do find it easier for my family.

Babyled Weaning/Skipping Purees
*  Again, on the cheap, lazy train... I could buy ridiculously overpriced purees (like a dollar a jar) or I could make them myself (precook all the veggies/meats/etc, puree and jar/freeze them myself) OR I could as C-McC shows interest, feed him what we eat (in age appropriate sizes/quantities, obviously).
*  I will also confess that C-McC preference pour moi was much enjoyed because it meant less mess... ugh, I hate the self-feeding mess.
*  By giving my boys what we eat, I have more control over what they eat (please do not read this as "my children have perfect diets... they only eat whole and 10000% nutritious food" because they don't).  We try to make stuff over buying stuff (from cookies to pasta sauce... it's cheaper that way).  And there are days where TT eats fruits & veggies like they are going out of style.

All of this to say - I am just doing my best to be the best parent that I can be.  I'm not perfect, not even close.  

I've joined the breastfeeding blog hop hosted by:
Life with Levi, The Slacker Mom & Diary of a Devil Dog Wife.  The topic this week is: World Breastfeeding Week, I've decided to include my "Why I do what I do" blog posting...

 

6 comments:

  1. and there are days where TT... what???

    hehe

    nice post! It is funny how I too get inspired to write a post after the LLL meetings.

    I like this line:
    I find it much easier to roll over and do what needs to be done than to *gasp* get out of bed, walk down the hall and do what needs to be done

    I agree completely :)

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  2. ps. I was going to ask you... does C-McC sleep in your bed/sidecar for his naps?

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  3. There are days where TT allows me to finish a thought! *hand-meet-head*

    Thanks... I do find myself inspired after our meetings :)

    YOUR post inspired me to share my thoughts.

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  4. Lindsay - it honestly depends on the day.
    There are days where C-McC is *super* clingy and I'm 99% certain that I wouldn't be able to transfer him from my lap (we nurse/cuddle to sleep). So, he naps on my lap (or if I have a carrier close enough that I can put it on and hold him [this doesn't happen often because I'm not a real smooth operator]).
    If I have stuff that *must* be done and he hasn't been a clingy guy all day, I will lay him down in his crib and then I have bins and pillows that I put up to *keep* him in his crib.

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  5. :)

    Okee dokee. Eli sleeps in random places too - never the same spot (sometimes lap, sometimes sling, sometimes bed with pillows, sometimes floor.... I figure if he sleeps... he sleeps, no fancy nap routine here - I guess it's okay?

    (hurray for a new domain name)

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  6. We're not schedule-y people... TT napped where ever, whenever & he's (so far) turned out fine ;)

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